God created Adam & Eve and the first thing he said was ‘Don’t’.
\n‘Don’t what?’ said Adam.
\nDon’t eat the forbidden fruit, God replied.
\nWhy asked Adam.
\nBecause I am your Father & I said so, God replied.
\nA few minutes later God saw his children having an apple break. He was not pleased and said Didn’t I tell you not to eat the fruit.
\nUh Uh said Adam
\nThen why did you? asked God
\nI don’t know said Eve
\nShe started it said Adam
\nDid not
\nDid too
\nDid not
\nHaving had enough of this God decided that, as punishment, Adam & Eve would have children of their own.
\nBut there is reassurance in this story. If you have persistently & lovingly tried to give children wisdom & they haven’t taken it, don’t be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?
\nThings to think about
\nYou spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk & talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down & shut up.
\nGrandchildren are God’s reward for not killing your own children.
\nMothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
\nChildren seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.
\nThe main purpose of holding children’s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
\nWe childproofed our homes but they are still getting in.
\nAdvice for the day
\nBe nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.
\nAnd finally…………….
\nIf you have a lot of tension & you get a headache. Do what it says on the aspirin bottle
\n‘Take two aspirin’ and ‘Keep away from children’.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
God created Adam & Eve and the first thing he said was ‘Don’t’. ‘Don’t what?’ said Adam. Don’t eat the forbidden fruit, God replied. Why asked Adam. Because I am…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2539","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2539","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2539"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2539\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2539"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2539"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.puerilis.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2539"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}